But I'm happy with the list, as presently constituted, for now. It may look very different in a few years, but if I go into it with that mindset, I'll never get it done. Perhaps I'll edit it post-script as it ebbs and flows. Perhaps not.
But enough preamble. Here they are, boys and ghouls. My top 10 favourite male athletes of all time.
1996-2017
Calgary Flames, Pittsburgh Penguins, Boston Bruins, Colorado Avalanche, Los Angeles Kings
It's quite strange how a man who never played for my particular NHL squad would somehow still claim honours as my favourite hockey player of all time. I could reel off any number of Canucks who I have admired over the years, but if you asked me to just choose one player, from any era, Iggy would be my guy.
The major factor, of course, is that when I started really paying attention to the NHL, it was in 2004, when the Calgary Flames blazed an unlikely trail to the Stanley Cup Finals. As is so often the case when a Canadian team does well, suddenly all rivalries were null and void. The entire nation was behind Calgary, as we longed for the title to finally return north of the border, where it belongs.
Alas, it wasn't to be. But the steely-nerved captain had left an indelible mark on me, all the same.
The NHL would enter a tumultuous period immediately after this. The Flames' chance at a comeback was squandered by the disastrous 2004-2005 lock-out, which was poorly timed for me as it was during one of my few visits back to Canada. Any machinations I had of following hockey while I was in the homeland were squandered, replaced instead by this catchy Molson commercial and little else.
Fortunately, I would get to see Iginla ascend to the echelons of hockey immortality in one very crucial play during the 2010 Winter Olympics. His tumbling feed to Sidney Crosby in overtime against the USA would be enough to earn his team the gold medal, and it's easily in my top 3 sporting moments of all time.
There's a reason why the picture of Iggy is from that Olympic run, man. Gotta savour those moments.
2009-2018
BC Lions
The BC Lions have had many greats come and go over the years, but none in the past decade have been quite as good, for as long, as one Travis Lulay.
I'm sure that when he arrived in BC following years of brutal cuts from the NFL, he figured he was just biding his time, hoping to show scouts back home that he had what it took to make it in the big league, ala Doug Flutie, Jeff Garcia and Warren Moon.
As it so happened, he stuck around, and in doing so, was instrumental in building one of the most unlikely championship teams in CFL history. When he won the 99th Grey Cup, he did so in rare fashion - on home turf, in Vancouver. Lulay was named MVP, capping off the victory with two crucial second half TDs in a season when he also claimed the CFL's most outstanding player award.
He quietly eked out one of the great CFL careers over his ten years in the league, carrying various iterations of his team across the finish line. Some of those teams were very good, some of them quite disastrous, but Lulay was a constant source of hope. When he was under centre, there was cause for optimism. The dude just flat out balled.
Also, out of all of the jerseys I own, his gunmetal black alternate is undoubtedly the slickest. Whoever came up with that design deserves a raise, it's the best damned jersey in football.
#8. Chris Bosh, NBA2003-2017
Toronto Raptors, Miami Heat
Chris Bosh's career is a weird rollercoaster of emotions. This bittersweet mixture of success in the face of certain failure, marred by setbacks time and time again. But throughout it, he kept his head held high. He kept fighting, kept working, and put together a lifetime of work that most people would be envious of.
Obviously, he rose to my attention as a member of the Toronto Raptors, and it's here that he first showed those aforementioned traits; he was so talented, like a man among boys, but he was held back by a mediocre roster. For every Jose Calderon, DeMar DeRozan or Morris Peterson, it seemed like there were a hundred Andrea Bargnanis, Rafael Araujos and Hedo Turkoglus.
His defection to the Miami Heat felt right, somehow, even to the beleaguered Raptors faithful. It was like we were all shooing him away, saying "get out, Chris! While you still can!"
And so he did, forming one of the most celebrated superteams of the modern era. It feels weird to say that Miami's two championships were a disappointment, but that's just how good they were on paper. With LeBron James and Dwyane Wade commanding most of the attention, Bosh changed his game wholesale to become the ultimate facilitator, and good lord, he did it well.
Though Ray Allen rightfully gets full credit for hitting the game-tying, series saving three pointer in the dying seconds of game 6 in the NBA Finals, without Bosh's unbelievable rebound over Manu Ginobili, the Heat walk away heartbroken.
Also, he's just a cool dude, and that's important to me. He's someone I would love to hang out with; introspective, goofy and humble. Thank god for Chris Bosh.
2004-2018
Baltimore Orioles, Tampa Bay Devil Rays, Kansas City Royals, Pittsburgh Pirates, Toronto Blue Jays, Atlanta Braves, New York Mets, Philadelphia Phillies
Look at that list of teams. For years, it looked as if Jose Bautista would be nothing more than a journeyman in MLB, a power hitter who could crack a few dingers to help sway the game in your favour. When he arrived in Toronto, he was coming off a Triple A stint earlier in the month.
He wasn't supposed to be anyone significant, much less the legend he would become.
To have been a Toronto Blue Jays fan over the last few decades has been to know disappointment. After winning back to back titles in 1992 and 1993, they would fall off a cliff from which it felt they would never return, wasting some spectacularly talented careers with their ineptitude.
But in Bautista, we had something else. He would become, as Eminem so eloquently said, "like a flame in the night, like a ghost in the dark, there's a ray, there's a light, there's a hope, there's a spark".
The Jays' brutally slow rise would be ushered in by Bautista's brilliance, putting together some dominant seasons in the early 2010's and joining the 50 homer club. Without his steady leadership, maybe the Jays never became as good as they later were.
The 2015 Toronto Blue Jays were the best team in baseball, and it breaks my heart that they didn't win the pennant. But we'll always have the bat flip, a moment that just screams pure, unrivalled swagger.
#6. Marcus Mariota2015-present
Tennessee Titans
Of all of the athletes on this list, Marcus Mariota is by far the most unproven. He has had a promising yet stuttering start to his NFL career, and presently sits at a crossroads. Maybe when we look back, we'll see an eventual backup whose promise was robbed by injuries. But hopefully, we'll instead be talking about a player who was a leader of men, who defied the odds to carry his team to glory.
First, we look at his exploits on the field, where he has shown enticing potential as an athletic passing dynamo, capable of escaping pressure before delivering man-sized stiff arms. In the post-Steve McNair era, we have been snakebitten by this archetype multiple times, thanks to dalliances with Vince Young and Jake Locker.
But Mariota feels different. Whereas both of those players were unable to match their mental game to their physical capabilities, Mariota is constantly striving to improve himself. He has had some truly wonderful moments, and his teammates clearly admire him.
Part of the reason for that is because of the human being he is, and that's a large influence on his placing in these rankings. Whether or not Mariota succeeds in the NFL, he has shown that he is a wonderful human being. He's soft spoken, respectful and inspirational; just one of those people that you want to see succeed.
Sometimes as a Tennessee Titans fan, I've had to support players who I really couldn't get behind as people (hello, Chris Johnson). But not this guy. Mariota is a consummate professional, and his demeanour is aspirational.
1996-2015
Phoenix Suns, Dallas Mavericks, Los Angeles Lakers
In my opinion, when you are talking about names synonymous with Canadian basketball, there are two that stand head and shoulders above the rest.
The first is Vince Carter, the man who made the sport cool in Toronto, and by extension, Canada as a whole. Without him, maybe the Raptors go the way of the Vancouver Grizzlies.
The other is Steve Nash, and there's no prizes for guessing why he stakes his claim.
Nash was the quintessential point guard, with nearly every possession running through him. Would he use his ball handling skills to secure an easy layup? Or would he drop improbable dimes through the legs of defenders to a streaking teammate? He could do it all, and did so with a dignity and strength that demanded admiration.
I knew that I wanted a picture of Nash that showed him battling through injury, but what I didn't realise was how many awesome images I would have to choose between, because the dude went through the wars. A bloody nose here, a busted lip there... or an eyebrow so swollen that he resembled Sloth from The Goonies.
The dude was a warrior, and his professionalism and determination earned him two MVP trophies. Speaking of Warriors, Nash would finally receive the championship rings that eluded him throughout his playing career, nabbing a pair as a player development consultant with Golden State.
1996-2004
Houston Oilers/Tennessee Oilers/Tennessee Titans, Dallas Cowboys
I'll elaborate a little bit more on this in a subsequent entry, but something that's important to note is that I wasn't really a big sports fan as a kid. You may have noted this from the comparatively modern feel consistent throughout these rankings and its distinct lack of classic players.
Eddie George is one of the earliest players I had an affinity for, which is unsurprising since the Tennessee Titans were the first team I started actively following in the early 2000s. To wit, I was a Raptors and Jays fan growing up in name only, but the Titans were the first team I lived and died by.
If we were to extrapolate this list to a top 20 or top 50, it would be littered with players on those teams. As they entered the new millennium, the Titans were a fearsome, smashmouth gang of bruisers that nobody wanted to play against. At the heart of his unit, Eddie George.
Speedy halfbacks are exciting and trendy, but I will always prefer a guy who just straight up plowed over anyone foolish enough to get in his way. His power running game was the engine that brought the Titans all the way to the Super Bowl.
He was fiery and inspirational, and when he wasn't leading the team with his actions, he was revving them up with his pregame speeches. This was a player you wanted to go to war with, someone you wanted to fight alongside. His charisma has even led him to a leading role on Broadway.
A man who wilfully trucks Ray Lewis, one of the best tacklers of all time, deserves recognition.
#3: Joe Carter, MLB1983-1998
Chicago Cubs, Cleveland Indians, San Diego Padres, Toronto Blue Jays, Baltimore Orioles, San Francisco Giants
Taking you on a rewind now, with a man who throws my previous statement asunder, somewhat.
Joe Carter stands on a pedestal in Toronto Blue Jays lore for obvious reasons, and for as long as I live, he will always hold a special place in my heart.
As aforementioned, when I was a kid, I liked the Jays, but for trivial reasons. My dad had a Blue Jays sweater that he liked to wear, and I had a t-shirt that had the roster represented as anthropomorphic birds. The reason why they were so celebrated in my household, of course, was because when we had arrived in Canada, they were at an unheralded peak of success.
Joe was a pure slugger with a winning smile and a heart of gold, and he came and went before I was ever paying attention. However, what he did, even watching it all of these years later, fills your belly with fire.
Watching his elation as he nabbed Otis Nixon's bunt attempt to seal the win in Atlanta and bring Toronto their first World Series championship is a special moment. For most franchises, it would be the pinnacle.
But of course, it's overshadowed by the fact that, one season later, Joe delivered what was, in my completely biased opinion, the best moment in baseball history.
Game 6, in Toronto. Mitch Williams on the mound. Carter on the 2-2, deep to left field, gone. Joe Carter won the World Series on home turf with a walkoff home run. Of all the moments etched into my brain on the sporting front, this homer is still #1. It doesn't even matter that I wasn't watching as a kid, it's just that special.
#2: Steve McNair, NFL1995-2007
Houston Oilers/Tennessee Oilers/Tennessee Titans, Baltimore Ravens
Having Steve McNair at #2 feels wrong. It feels like a misprint of some sort, something to be rectified later. This is because, you see, McNair was the man who made me love sports, back in 2002.
I can't remember why I decided I wanted to start watching football with my dad, but in the early days when I was trying to find a team to follow, I needed someone to gravitate towards. I liked the Raiders and the Bears, but something was missing...
That something was Steve McNair.
He is the most beloved figure in Tennessee Titans history, and with good reason. He was absolutely unstoppable when he was on a roll, shedding tacklers and delivering long bombs when everything seemed lost.
'Quit' was not in the McNair dictionary, and it showed in the way he would return to the field, even after taking an absolute beating. His list of injuries is almost as long as his list of accomplishments, but he just kept coming back.
He was instrumental in bringing the Titans to their first and only Super Bowl appearance, and though he ended on the wrong side of one of the most exciting finishes in championship history, his exploits in that game remain the stuff of legend.
And to think, that wasn't even McNair at his best; that was yet to come as he began to find himself as a passer, claiming co-MVP honours in 2003-04 alongside his old rival, Peyton Manning.
There's a reason why my username is Tackhead9, after all. And it's all thanks to this quiet, stoic country boy from Mississippi. We miss you, Steve.
#1: Kyle Lowry, NBA2006-present
Memphis Grizzlies, Houston Rockets, Toronto Raptors
Recency bias? Maybe. But I know for sure that when I'm an old man, sitting in my rocking chair and staring into my viewing orb (which sounds like a feasible futuristic thing), I will still remember how this chubby, surly kid from Philadelphia grew into a leader before my very eyes.
Kyle Lowry was something of a malcontent when he began his NBA career. He was scrappy and impetuous, which made him a force to be reckoned with both on the court and off. He butted heads with coaches along the way, and came to the Toronto Raptors as a consolation prize when they failed to woo Steve Nash in 2012.
I recall my deflation when they fell short on their bid to bring Nash home. In what seemed to be a toss up between Toronto and New York, I went away for a few days with no reception. When I finally got my phone back in service, I saw the news: Steve Nash to the Lakers.
Lowry was the backup plan, and in most eyes, just a way to bridge the gap as they searched for someone to finally supplant incumbent starter, Jose Calderon. But something weird happened: Lowry outperformed expectations.
He showed a knack for scoring, for racking up assists, for playing elite defence and drawing painful but crucial charges against opponents who had about a foot and a half on him. He quickly grew to become my favourite NBA player with his gumption, and alongside DeMar DeRozan, he ushered the hapless Raptors into a new era of unprecedented success.
Of course, nobody ever expected it to progress beyond that.
The Raptors were a lock for the postseason, and could probably steal a series before running into a brick wall in the form of LeBron's Cleveland Cavaliers. It would take the testicular fortitude of Masai Ujiri and the mercurial talent of Kawhi Leonard to unlock Lowry's true potential.
Now, Kyle Lowry is an NBA Champion. The Toronto freakin' Raptors are NBA Champions.
I have loved this franchise since they first began, even though it was initially just because raptors were my favourite dinosaur. Their inglorious history seemed insurmountable, and they would always be loveable losers.
But Lowry demanded more. He demanded more of himself, and of his teammates. Where others had bolted, he and DeRozan committed, year after year, to improving. To tinkering. And though alas, DeMar wouldn't be able to see that effort bear fruit, Lowry's journey came full circle.
He was now an NBA stalwart, a bonafide all-star and one of the greatest basketball players in the world. He saw the jokes. He heard the naysayers. He simply did not care.
I have assigned many adjectives to Lowry over the years to describe just how special he is as an athlete and as a human being. Now, at long last, I can designate him as the only one that really matters: he is a winner.
Kyle Lowry Over Everything.
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