As dormant as my wrestling obsession is, it's still managed to be an ever-shifting and evolving creature, so this list could be shaken up time and time again as I broaden my horizons. For now, at least, it's pretty solid. Let me take you on a journey through the squared circle...!
#20: GoldustReal name: Dustin Virgil Riley Runnels III
Debut: 1988
From: Hollywood, California
Height: 6'6" Weight: 232 lbs.
By and large, I'm not a fan of gimmicks. When done wrong, they can completely belittle the talents of competent wrestlers, overtaking the actual athlete to become their main, damning aspect (see: Terry Taylor as the Red Rooster). Occasionally, a gimmick works, and becomes a crucial component that can separate your typical wrestler from the crowd (see: Mark Calloway as the Undertaker).
Where do I stand, then, on Goldust? On the one hand, I actually adore the character - his promos have been some of the best in the business over the years, his look is unique, and his persona and in-ring antics are hilarious. On the other hand, people tend to forget that Dustin Runnels is actually a really freakin' good wrestler: his pace and in-ring psychology are solid, and some may assume that his flamboyant character have relegated him to the role of 'supporting cast'. You'll never have Goldust as your heavyweight champion, but based on his merit alone, Runnels would suit the role nicely.
#19: Rey MysterioReal name: Óscar Gutiérrez
Debut: 1989
From: San Diego, California
Height: 5'6" Weight: 175 lbs.
Though most Americans are aware of the legend of lucha libre, without Rey Mysterio, Jr., it may not have shot into the forefront of the social conscience the way it has. Observe: mention the names El Santo or Mil Máscaras, most casual fans will look at you with bemusement. Just say Rey Mysterio and - ¡Dios mío! - vivid images of the human propellor launch to mind.
Rey Rey has gone through endless nonsense throughout his career: unmasked in WCW (the Mexican equivalent to a spiritual depantsing), Mysterio could have gone down the route of endless little guys before him: perpetual cruiserweight who never hits the big time. Thankfully, WWE gave him the push he deserved, capturing three world championships. His flea like stature makes him a spectacle to watch, and all these years later, despite injuries slowing him down, he's still better value than wrestlers half his age.
#18: Ricky "The Dragon" SteamboatReal name: Richard Henry Blood Sr.
Debut: 1976
From: Honolulu, Hawaii
Height: 5'10" Weight: 235 lbs.
It's no secret that wrestling has long been a club for the big boys; behemoths who tower over the competition and move with the agility of a sack of rye. Though things have definitely changed for the better in recent years, when a short, intense guy of partial Japanese descent like Steamboat hit the scene in the late 70s, he had all of the odds stacked against him. However, Ricky Steamboat was a no-nonsense competitor: intense, precise and explosive. He captured hearts and imaginations as the landscape of wrestling was beginning to shift, and we were all the beneficiaries of his abilities.
For one thing, Steamboat is one of those guys who you just really believed could legitimately beat the everlasting shit out of you. It certainly helped that he was portrayed as a Bruce Lee-type figure. And yes, that's a gross generalisation of Asian martial arts, but it certainly worked. He had that definite feel to him of a lethal weapon - this was obviously a man you didn't want to mess with.
#17: EdgeReal name: Adam Joseph Copeland
Debut: 1992
From: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Height: 6'5" Weight: 241 lbs.
Depending on when you were watching wrestling, you might remember a very different edition of Edge, each with their own merits, each with their own achievements. The later version, fuelled by a lot of legitimate heat, rose to be one of the best heels in the game - an incredible performer capable of generating vitriol that had been absent in years. It was at this time he saw the height of his success, claiming multiple heavyweight championships and looked to as the wrestler who revitalised the position of the company's top bad guy.
The version I knew and loved, however, was that of a man who did whatever had to be done to compel the fans. Unfortunately for him, that frequently involved him doing things that would make normal men cringe. Edge took and delivered bumps that were punishing and brutal, and kept coming back for more. Take a brief sojourn through either of the TLC classics, if you will, to see the fullest extent of this punishment. These are the things of legend.
#16: Shelton Benjamin
Real name: Shelton James Benjamin
Debut: 2000
From: Orangeburg, South Carolina
Height: 6'2" Weight: 248 lbs.
From: Orangeburg, South Carolina
Height: 6'2" Weight: 248 lbs.
So let's talk about missed opportunities here. When Kurt Angle came along, you had a legitimate amateur wrestler with a great look and boundless charisma, whose transition to the pro game was seamless. He would go on to become a world champion with the WWE six times. Shelton Benjamin, cut largely in the same mould, got a few good angles (no pun intended), but never got the nod to become the main event.
And it's a damn shame, because in Benjamin you have a pure specimen who is smooth, exciting and clinical. Of course, WWE achievements aren't necessarily a true barometer of success (DDP, anyone?) but considering it's where I've spent most of my viewing past, it's of significance in my rankings. If I were assembling a company tomorrow (and who knows? Maybe I will! I have some spare time), I would definitely book Benjamin as my #1 guy.
#15: Dean MalenkoReal name: Dean Simon
Debut: 1979
From: Tampa, Florida
Height: 5'10" Weight: 212 lbs.
We shift, quite radically, from a larger than life character to a man who was all about business. Every single technique that Malenko implemented was picture perfect. You want the best suplex? Watch Malenko. You want the best single leg crab? Watch Malenko. You want to learn how to nail any manoeuvre, simple or complex, you need look no further than this man.
In a business where promos can make or break the man, he was straight to the point. Not flashy. Sometimes, he even looked uncomfortable. But as soon as he got between those ropes, you knew you were in for a treat. Should I ever seek a trainer for my illustrious wrestling career (I never could settle on a finisher, I'll have you know), Malenko is one of the top three guys I would seek out, no question at all.
#14: Booker TReal name: Booker Huffman Jr.
Debut: 1989
From: Houston, Texas
Height: 6'3" Weight: 256 lbs.
Oh hell yes. I've been looking forward to talking about Booker T, an electrifying in-ring performer who delivered everything so solidly, you practically felt the sting. However, I've been most looking forward to this because he is one of my favourite entertainers in wrestling history. His promos were loud, wild and wacky, and his colourful stint tagging with Goldust is easily among my top 10 tag teams (another list for another article, methinks).
A five time (Five time! Five time! Five time! Five time!) WCW champion, Booker took a backseat for years in the WWE, for reasons I still haven't quite figured out. He didn't have the heavyweight strap around his waist until the curious King Booker angle, a royalty gimmick that I wasn't particularly into. Why not just give him the gold without the schtick? It certainly worked everywhere else! Ahh, who knows... Point is, Booker gave you a great show, whether it was in the ring, or on the mic. It's no wonder he transitioned so smoothly to commentating.
#13: Christian
Debut: 1995
From: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Height: 6'1" Weight: 212 lbs.
Frequently in tag teams, there's a tier system in place. There's the guy, and then there's the guy. Marty Jannetty and Shawn Michaels. Jim Neidhart and Bret Hart. ...Christian and Edge? Some may argue such, and though Christian's real life best friend Edge did hit incredible heights, I was always more of a Christian guy. Edge was the looker, Christian gave you the grittiness and the... oh, forgive me for this... the undeniable edge.
A necessary heel in my eyes, Christian bounced through many hilarious personas following the team's demise; and whether you prefer his early, sparkle-laden antics, second-in-command of the Un-Americans, his tenure as the CLB, or the hilarity of Captain Charisma and his 'Peeps', he offered you endless value. It goes without saying that he was dynamite between the ropes to boot, but damn man, Christian easily ranks in my top ten on the mic. Even if you hadn't realised it before, sit there and think about it... I'm right, aren't I?
#12: Cactus Jack
Real name: Michael Francis FoleyDebut: 1983
From: Truth or Consequences, New Mexico
Height: 6'2" Weight: 287 lbs.
Join me, if you'd like, in a game known as 'Pick Your Mick'. Effectively, Mick Foley donned three major personas during his career and, unlike most wrestlers who would prefer for some of their alter egos to be forgotten (I'm looking at you, Isaac Yankem, DDS!!), Foley dedicated to each wholly and successfully, to the point where they are almost considered different wrestlers each and of their own. He saw the height of his success as Mankind, the leather-masked freak who attacked opponents with a dirty sock, and his dream character and career prequel, one Dude Love, may be Foley's personal favourite - a man who preaches fun, freedom and good times. But for me, and this is probably largely due to the journey his first autobiography took me on, I'll always be a Cactus Jack guy. Because who doesn't love a batshit crazy cowboy? It fit Foley to a tee - and we all know the man was batshit crazy in all of the best ways. His promos were intense, bizarre and cerebral, and his bumps? Oh god, the way he would bump!
Let's be honest, Foley was us, man... And we loved him for it.
#11: William RegalReal name: Darren Kenneth Matthews
Debut: 1983
From: Blackpool, England
Height: 6'3" Weight: 243 lbs.
Putting the fun back in fundamentals since 1983, William (or Steve, if you prefer) Regal is a wonderful juxtaposition of classy British personality with ruthless, brutish physicality. Regal taught us that it was perfectly acceptable to be a thug, as long as you did it with dignity. Seriously though, Regal gave you the whole package: he was one of the top in-ring mechanics, he had seething, venomous power on the microphone, and understood match psychology like few others. Though a lot of his WWE stint was played for laughs (slugging the opponents with brass knuckles, kissing McMahon's rear and - my personal favourite - accidentally peeing on the Big Show's leg), there was nothing funny about his talent. His occasional partnerships with Lance Storm (two-time WWE World Tag champs) is one of my favourite duos of all time, and a perfect example of what happens when you pair two talented wrestlers together.
#10: Mr. PerfectReal name: Curtis Michael "Curt" Hennig
Debut: 1980
From: Robbinsdale, Minnesota
Height: 6'3" Weight: 257 lbs.
Rarely has a moniker suited a wrestler so well. Mr. Perfect was everything he was advertised to be, and a revelation between the ropes that still gets me excited to this day. His look: perfect. His physique and smug grin made him a recognisable grappler. His promos: perfect +. Just pick one and watch it - you will be enamoured with him instantly (if you're unsure, try his meeting with Vikings' tight end Steve Jordan). His ability in the ring? perfect ++. He moved at a speed that made him look like a man half his size; he was quick, exciting and methodical. He made things thrilling in a way other big men weren't at the time (save for one guy who may make an appearance later in this list!)
...Oh, and for the record, if we're talking about his entrance music, it is perfect ++++. I want to walk down the wedding aisle to that shit, man.
#9: Eddie GuerreroReal name: Eduardo Gory "Eddie" Guerrero Llanes
Debut: 1987
From: El Paso, Texas
Height: 5'8" Weight: 220 lbs.
You may have surmised while looking through this list that I have a particular affinity for heels. Whether it's a coincidence, or the fact that their role of antagonising the crowd makes them more fun to me, I seem more likely to be cheering for the guy who's getting the jeers. For much of his career, this was Eddie Guerrero, but later on, he became the WWE's new version of Stone Cold Steve Austin: a guy who did all of the wrong things, but we just loved him all the more.
Guerrero's face turn, circa 2002, made him one of the most endearing characters of all time. Like they said, he lied, he cheated and he stole, but at least he was honest about it. I'm loath to mention Chris Benoit, but the moment the two shared at WrestleMania XX as champions was beautiful. Eddie had a lot more in the tank, and his early death is one of the reasons I began to lose interest in wrestling.
#8: Owen HartReal name: Owen James Hart
Debut: 1983
From: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Height: 5'10" Weight: 229 lbs.
While we're on the subject of early deaths, we will never forget the horrible, tragic way that Owen Hart's life ended way too soon. What people tend to forget, however, is that during his career, he was possibly the most underrated wrestler of all time.
Owen was just dynamite, man. He was electric, he was clever and he was spritely. Often relegated to the shadows as 'Bret's brother', it was through no fault of his own that he didn't receive the necessary push to become the top dog. He was interchangeable as a face or a heel, he brought you everything you wanted as a wrestler and a human being, and he could do it all, no matter what gimmick you lumped him with. I don't know why, but sixteen years after the accident, thinking about all of the untapped potential Owen had still makes me mad as hell.
#7: Jushin Thunder LigerReal name: Keiichi Yamada
Debut: 1984
From: Tokyo, Japan
Height: 5'7" Weight: 209 lbs.
Do you have a favourite Japanese wrestler? Whether you're a fan of Tiger Mask or Ultimo Dragon or any of the myriad to have come from the land of the rising sun, one thing remains consistent: talent. Without the American obsession with pushing guys based more on their size than their ability, you often see the cream of the crop in Japanese wrestling, and a purer product as a result.
Liger's anime-based appearance is a sight to behold, but once the match starts, the true amazement begins. His fluidity and athleticism are top notch, and the fact that it's hard to tell how old he is in a match is a testament to how he has remained at the top of his game for so long. Though he saw his best success in the USA with WCW, his top stuff was when he was back home in Japan. Check out Liger vs. Owen Hart for a prime example of this!
#6: "Macho Man" Randy SavageReal name: Randy Mario Poffo
Debut: 1973
From: Sarasota, Florida
Height: 6'2" Weight: 237 lbs.
Ohhhhh yeaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!! Though Hulk Hogan was the biggest thing in wrestling during the 80s, the most talented headliner on the card was undoubtedly the Macho Man. Where do you begin when describing the legend of Randy Savage? I guess first, you'd address his character, which could be best summarised as 'batshit crazy'. The shades, the hat, the promos with Mean Gene Okerlund that teetered between incomprehensible noises and complete lunacy, he was the whole package in the weirdest possible way. But let's not forget what he was when he was in the squared circle: simply one of the most athletic and energetic big men in wrestling history. I remember a tag match where him and Hogan were together. Hulk's was the standard fare of the time; slow-paced and crowd influencing. Then, Savage tags in and comes flying at the opponents like the Tasmanian Devil. He always seemed to be, as I once saw it so eloquently put, 'high as balls', and it resulted in one of the most legendary and enduring figures in wrestling.
#5: Bret HartReal name: Bret Hart
Debut: 1978
From: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Height: 6'0", Weight: 235 lbs.
Whenever a debate occurs about where the greatest wrestlers come from, it doesn't take the Canadian participant long to mention the Hit Man. He is one of the purest top guys in WWE history: a man who embodied everything it took to be the perfect wrestler.
A fan favourite as one of many tag combinations and still recognised as one of the greatest heavyweight champions of all time (five times in WWE alone), Bret remains the pinnacle of what every Canadian wrestler aspires to be: a guy who let his talent do the talking, and who projected an aura unlike any other. He was the unquestioned star of the pre-Attitude 90s era, and as a result, he became a staple of the many curiosities of our childhood that we still hold dear today. Whether it's his appearance on the Simpsons ('this place has got old man stink!') or as one of the participants of the greatest wrestling game of all time... You know the one...
#4: The New Day (Xavier Woods, Big E & Kofi Kingston)
Real names: Austin Watson, Ettore Ewen & Kofi Nahaje Sarkodie-Mensahamp
Debut: 2014
From: various
Combined Weight: 702 lbs.
I tried to just pick one. I really, truly did. Because this was supposed to be a list of my favourite wrestlers - and this entry will stick out like a sore thumb. Is it Kofi's athleticism? Xavier's wizardry with the mic? Or Big E's fluidity that makes him look like a man half his size? It's... it's just everything, man. I couldn't choose. Because as a collective, they have reignited my interest in wrestling. Each of them is fantastic, but this faction has captivated me in a way that no other has before. Their gimmick is wondrous, their promos unrivalled, their matches sharp and yet oh so much goofy fun. Lumped with a run-of-the-mill gospel schtick, they retooled it to become the most refreshing thing in wrestling in, dare I say it, more than a decade. I just love them, and I hope beyond hope that their tenure is a long one. They've got so much more left to do, and I look forward to it. And if you really dislike the fact that I listed a trio in my top 20, I'm sorry for ruining your jamboree.
#3: Chris JerichoReal name: Christopher Keith Irvine
Debut: 1990
From: Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
Height: 6'0" Weight: 227 lbs.
Third place goes to the best heel of the new millennium: Chris freakin' Jericho. This guy is pure money, man. A rockstar (legitimately, no less) who oozes charisma, he's simply infectious. You want to watch Jericho, whether you love him or hate him. One of the true students of the game, Jericho was like putty, mouldable to best complement the abilities of his opponents. If you needed him to be a grounded technician, he brought it. If you needed an up-tempo flyer, look no further. There was nothing he couldn't do - the only limitations were your imagination.
I already alluded to it, but Jericho not only ranks top three for my overall wrestlers, he's easily top three in the promo game, to boot. He takes a storyline and just runs with it, building momentum and energy that makes it the most important thing on the card. Then, the match happens, and what do you know? It steals the show. He just brings it, man.
#2: Kurt AngleReal name: Kurt Steven Angle
Debut: 1998
From: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Height: 6'0" Weight: 240 lbs.
Whenever the legitimacy of professional wrestling comes under fire, my trump card remains Kurt Angle, perhaps the greatest pro wrestler of all time. We all know the story; he's a legitimate gold medal Olympian. He made the jump to the pro game, and he had a rookie campaign akin to Oscar Robertson. From there, he just never stopped, having a knack for sports entertainment that makes him the top dog no matter where he goes. He was just the absolute best - unrivalled as a pure wrestler, often hilarious and fantastic fun on the microphone, and courageous enough to give anything a shot: see, his moonsault off the cage. See further, any of his moonsaults, which are the prettiest in the game.
Remember before how I said that if I had a company, Benjamin would get a push as #1? For the record, Angle would be the one running the whole show.
#1: Lance StormReal name: Lance Timothy Evers
Debut: 1990
From: Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Height: 5'1" Weight: 231 lbs.
Anyone who knows my wrestling history ('sup Dennie?) knows that this spot was never in question. When I began to actively follow wrestling in about 2000, I was watching WCW, and I instantly became a fan of Lance Storm. He is my Steve McNair, my Joe Carter - my most favourite athlete of the pro wrestling world! And why wouldn't he be; his matches are like butter, man, because they are smooth as hell. A man who grappled better than most others, Lance was typically a heel (and that's how I prefer him, mostly), but when he did a face turn in 2003, he opened up a whole new bag of tricks. Despite the fact he was 34 years old and no spring chicken, he was bouncing and flipping about like a man half his age. It made you realise: he could always do the high-flying antics, but he chose not to because he understood that as the villain, he could not get the crowd on his side. A true genius. A cunning veteran. And my favourite wrestler. Bless you, Lance.
